Taylor Swift and T-Pain, “Thug Story”

16 Jun

I’m not speechless. But I’m close.

After the jump, the full opening, some reaction, and the lyrics.

Look, T-Pain’s the best hook man in hip-hop. Taylor Swift’s got a genius for pop songwriting with a country twang. I have no idea who wrote this little ditty (I’d wager it’s a half-and-half deal), but it’s good. It’s goofy without being exploitative or stupid, catchy in all the right ways, and, generally, fun.

And, what’s better, this is Faheem Najm’s typical hook game on display, and Swift’s more than proficient on the mic; she’s almost at double-time on “never really been in a club,” and it sounds natural. Like “I’m On a Boat,” the spiritual predecessor to this song, this is a dollop of creativity on top of a ton of flawless execution; just remember this when, by July, this song is bigger than that one.

Plus: “I’m so gangsta you can find me baking cookies at night.”

The full opening:


Hey (Hey)
T-Swizzle (T-Swizzle)
T-Pizzle (T-Pizzle)

I’m like eight-foot-fo’, blonde hair to the flo’
You shawties never thought I dreamed about rapping hardcore
No, I ain’t got a gun
No, I never really been in a club
I still live with my parents but I’m still a thug
I’m so gangsta you can find me baking cookies at night
You out clubbin’? Well, I just made Caramel Delights
T-Swizz and T-Pain, rapping on the same track
It’s a thug story, tell me can you handle that?
I had a dream last night
I had high-top Nikes
I had diamonds in my mouth
And diamonds on my mic
By the time I awoke I was singin’
(I’m on a boa-o-whoa-oat)

‘Cause I’m a singa ternt rapper (Shawty, I’ma make ya)
Straight to the top, yo (Shawty, I’ma take ya)
You can call me T-Sweezy, now I’m a rap star (It’s a thug story, now tell ’em who you are)
Singa ternt gangsta (You don’t wanna fight me)
Straight to the top (In my extra small white tee)
T-Swizzle, T-Pain, all up on the same track
It’s a thug story, now can you get with that?
What? What? I knit sweaters, yo
What? What? Don’t test me, (bleep)

Hey, hold on
Hold on, I didn’t even say anything
I said yo (Yo)
You guys bleeped me and I didn’t even say anything
I didn’t even swear (She didn’t even swear)
Hello? Ugh

11 Responses to “Taylor Swift and T-Pain, “Thug Story””

  1. eclipC June 17, 2009 at 12:35 PM #

    This is bull shit. That fucking girl doesn’t make rap. And that stupid guy doesn’t know what the fuck the street is.
    They are not thugs. They don’t know what thug life is. They live off the money.
    And you, stupid blogger, are a mother fucker.

    • Rebecca February 13, 2013 at 8:50 AM #

      Wow, thank you so much for your opinion!
      However, I feel I should point out…

      A) This is Taylor Swift. Seriously? She knows she’s not a “thug.” It was a joke.

      B) if you wanted your comment to have a bigger effect, than you should have used better word choice than “silly” and “stupid.” Here are some adjectives you might want to think about: moronic, simple-minded, brainless, dazed, deficient, dense, dim, doltish, dopey*, dull, dumb, dummy*, foolish, futile, gullible, half-baked*, half-witted*, idiotic, ill-advised, imbecilic, inane, indiscreet, insensate, irrelevant, laughable, loser*, ludicrous, meaningless, mindless, moronic, naive, nonsensical, obtuse, out to lunch, pointless, puerile, rash, senseless, shortsighted, simple, simpleminded, slow, sluggish, stolid, stupefied, thick, thick-headed, trivial, unintelligent, unthinking, witless.

      Next time you want to verbally abuse someone on the Internet, you
      can use any one of these words. Not only will you succeed in making them feel small, you won’t make a total idiot of yourself.

      Hope I helped!

  2. Rockabye June 17, 2009 at 1:40 PM #

    Thanks for visiting!

  3. cal1andor June 17, 2009 at 6:39 PM #

    Are we allowed to delete comments that are stupid?

  4. Bandit June 17, 2009 at 11:59 PM #

    Taylor Swift doesn’t make a very good thug, she’s too cute

  5. Rockabye June 18, 2009 at 1:41 AM #

    We could. We could also filter.

    I just let it roll off my back.

  6. Maff June 20, 2009 at 10:07 PM #

    Best Song Eveer!
    I Love Tay Swift
    And I Love T-pain too!
    I Am Thug Can You Handle That?
    eclipC doesnt have humor or what?

  7. your June 21, 2009 at 11:40 AM #

    Haha…I bet eclipC has spent ALOT of time in the “streets”. What a faggot!

  8. Nikki June 22, 2009 at 9:01 PM #

    I was totally caught off guard by this– though, it was hilarious none the less. It’s very ‘I’m On a Boat’-ish in the sense that it’s poking fun and whatnot, but Taylor Swift is much more enjoyable than Andy Samberg.

    I do think that Star Trek was effing hilarious. I was almost on the ground when she attempted the Vulcan salute.

  9. s June 23, 2009 at 7:58 PM #

    eclipC…your an ass

    and if your even on here making some kind of crap comment really means your not exactly from the street scene either.

  10. crankywriter July 12, 2009 at 3:10 AM #

    First time I heard, I though it was a joke of some kind.
    It’s still funny though.
    Btw, great site RockaBye 😀

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